headcanon that after his adventures, when bilbo did the dishes, he sometimes sang ‘that’s what bilbo baggins hates’ quietly to himself

"But what I really hate is that you idiots went and got yourself kil-"

Bilbo presses a wet wrist against his mouth, heedless of the drips he’s getting on his waistcoat. It takes a few deep, hitching breaths and carefully putting down a saucer, but he doesn’t break a thing, not this time.

Whenever this happens, he makes sure not to let the dishes pile up in the sink for a week or more. Not one fork not one plate.

He just doesn’t like a mess, is all.